I’m All Ears

I always wondered what they said
after they tucked me into bed.
I used to tiptoe down the stairs
And hold my breath and say my prayers.
Well I don’t do that anymore.
I’m nine now and much too mature.
Besides I have an I’m-All-Ears.
I can’t help what she overhears.
If someone’s speaking very low
I’m-All-Ears ears begin to grow.
They grow until she’s overheard
and told me every single word.
She snacks on whispers. I can’t stop her.
She’s part gossip, part eavesdropper.

ATOTB-NGThe Nightnoise Gladiator

When the radiator hisses,
when the hall stairs creak and moan,
when there’s something downstairs ringing
but it’s not the telephone;

When the back door lock is squeaking,
when you think you hear a knock,
when there’s something upstairs ticking
but it’s not Grandfather’s clock;

When the refrigerator rattles,
when the window curtains swish,
when the bathroom sink drip drips, drip drips,
I close my eyes and wish

I had a Nightnoise Gladiator.
There is nothing he enjoys
more than eating till he’s gobbled up
his enemy: Night Noise.

ATOTB-CCChannel Changer

We have a billion stations.
We have cable and of course
a satellite night hookup
with a backup power source.

We have a giant screen TV
with Dolby surround sound.
That darn remote control thing,
though, never can be found.

That’s why a Channel Changer
is a pet beyond compare.
He surfs through the commercials
and he never needs repair.

His ears are each antennas.
His one eye is open wide.
I never have to walk him
since he hates to go outside.

He doesn’t get much exercise
but anyone can tell he
loves to press each button
on his billion-button belly.